Dear Vitamin C –
My boyfriend and I have been dating for two years now and have lately been talking about getting married. Over all we have a good relationship my only concern is that he is always telling me that I am too sensitive. It is true that I get my feelings hurt a lot and I have tried to be stronger but it hasn’t worked. I am worried that my sensitivity level is ruining my relationship. Are there things that I can do to be less sensitive?
Thanks in advance – Too sensitive
Dear Too Sensitive –
I view sensitivity much like I view thirst. You can’t judge someone else’s level by your own. Just like you wouldn’t say to someone “You’re too thirsty” the same is true for sensitivity it is just where you are. Just like with thirst if you think you are too thirsty you can get curious about finding the source of it and making adjustments until you feel more comfortable. If you are uncomfortable with your level of sensitivity you can look for the source by asking “why am I getting triggered by this?” The more you understand your triggers the less they have a chance to derail you. If you feel comfortable with your level of sensitivity then the problem may lie in your partner’s tolerance for vulnerability.